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Is it just me or did Governor Mark Sanford of South Carolina catch the break of a life time when Michael Jackson died and he jumped out of the news bracket, but he is too ‘gracious’ to take that and won’t shut the hell up? Let me get the few of you that were not caught up on the story.

From June 18th to June 24th, Sanford went ‘missing’, in so many words. His wife, kids, staffers, no one, knew where he was, gaining national publicity and exposure. Many said, including himself (supposedly), he was hiking in the Appalachian Mountains and got lost, but several hours after arriving back in the US, and upon learning that incriminating evidence was being swiftly mobilized against him by the press, Sanford held a conference, during which he admitted that he had been unfaithful to his wife. Not, a hi, or a how ya doing or nothing, just bust outs the, “Oh, I was BRBing and in Argentina having a good time with a hot and sexy 41-year old International Affairs major mother of two.”

Many pushed for him to resign, but, oh, that was just way to easy for Mr. Sanford.

But, God shined down upon him, the gifts of all gifts. A tragedy that would get him out of this great debacle he was in, Michael Jackson passed on. The gift of a life time for him and his camp. The media that was hounding all over him, heard the loud noise of Michael Jackson’s death and turned away to that. All Sanford would do is duck his head, head out the back door, and the whole thing will just blow over.

But, Sanford did a interview with the Associated Press.

*insert sound of face thudding to hands*

He then claimed in an interview that his love with the women in Argentina, that she was his soul mate. Jesus, man. In the great words of Jon Stewart on the Daily Show, “God killed Michael Jackson to save your ass and then you gave another interview!?” In this horrible interview, he claims he has had more than one affair in his life. God, and it only gets worse from there.

But, he claims that his affair was more than that as he calls it a, “A love story. A forbidden one, a tragic one, but a love story at the end of the day.” You know, truly bring out the teenager in himself with this statement. But, I digress.

Ironically, Sanford who was among the loudest about President Clinton’s indiscretion, and those of others – chooses to share every sophomoric detail of his, in press conferences – which he calls! This, comes on the heels of God’s intercession for Sanford, Michael Jackson death. The Big Guy threw him a life-line he’s ignored. Sanford has even passed on the conditions of the GOP’s willingness to forgive and forget. They said they would if Mrs. Sanford could, which is something I thought there was little chance of seeing. Amazingly, she said she would, but the Wild Bull of the Pampas is having none of it! Is it me, or is this starting to sound like a Molly Ringwold movie, if only they’d had hot and steamy email back then?